I've spent a lot of time at the Beorningstead hanging about feeling utterly useless.  Let's face it, I am my mother's child.  That means I am not really a perfectionist.  We could be related to Red Green.  We like Duct Tape.  We just want to get it done.

My Sweet Beorn, on the other hand, can (and will) dig a painstakingly perfect square hole.  He measures three times and cuts one.  And if that isn't good enough, he does it all over again.  He doesn't care how long a task takes as long as it is done properly and well.  I honestly don't know how he can stand to live with me sometimes.

So a couple of weeks ago, he showed me how to install outlets.  I was amazed at how easy the first couple were.  Sure, I had to crouch on the floor and use an irritating little non-ratcheting screwdriver - but the process itself is simple enough.  Black wire gets hooked around the gold screw, tighten it down.  White wire gets hooked to the silver screw and the copper wire has to hook on the green screw.  No problem.

But sometimes you have to lead from one outlet to the next.  That's not so bad because you just connect the second wire to the second set of screws except that there's only one green ground screw so you have to connect a short extra length of copper to the two copper ground wires, hold it all together with a wire nut and connect that third length of wire to the one green screw. 

Then you have to cram all of those wires into the box, and screw them in. 

This sounds easy.  It is not.  This is why electricians have big, meaty fingers with which to apply hundreds of pounds of pressure on unruly wires, squeezing and folding them to fit with one hand while pushing the outlet into the box with the other.

Sometimes you have to do this in very tight quarters, almost standing on your head.

Sometimes you go through the whole process and discover that you have installed the outlet Upside Down.

Then you have to unscrew the outlet and turn it right side up and try to get the wires to all fit in again in a new configuration.


This is why electricians are paid big money.  This is also why they have ratcheting screwdrivers.  I bought one the other day.  It makes me happy.

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